Reflections #0031

A straightforward yet powerful practices I adopted over time is ‘Smiling at Strangers in Public Spaces’. It is the most vulnerable yet instantaneously rewarding act I indulge in from time to time.

How did it start? At some point, I noticed two patterns about myself. I would withdraw into myself when I am alone and loose complete sense of the context I am in. I would be so lost that I would barely acknowledge the presence of other people around. If I ever tried to look at someone, there would be an immediate sense of withdrawal, a reactive act of repulsion against the world.

I didn’t like who I was becoming. I wish to see the world as a friendly place. I felt my actions were going against who I wanted to be. I wanted to feel connected with myself and others around me instead of being cocooned like this. I was willing to be myself and let people see me for who I am.

Every time I choose to look up, look around and smile, I find it challenging and even terrifying. Sometimes it takes me to the verge of shame. Other times, I have a good laugh at myself. The surprising and beautiful part is that very rarely do I face rejection. People reciprocate and sometimes over joyously. Knowing the odds of success also doesn’t make it easy, but it gives me the courage to keep trying.

There are, of course, all kinds of social generalisations that I have picked up over time. I think it’s a good reflection of my familial and cultural conditioning. It’s far easy to make contact with children and the elderly than with people in the middle ages. While it is easy to connect with strangers who are men, women are most likely to reciprocate warmth. I also find public spaces with lower and middle-income backgrounds more inviting than malls and airports. So many biases, judgements and fears come to light whenever I choose to be playful.

Would I recommend this? Wholeheartedly. I feel the world would be much warmer if we frequently opened our hearts to each other. If we look into other people’s eyes and let ourselves be seen, we are sure to become kinder and gentler to ourselves. If other people can accept me for who I am despite my fears, biases and judgements, who am I to reject myself? If each of us can see the world to be a friendly place, it would be so much easier to connect, collaborate and celebrate.

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